I can’t sleep. I want to be sleep. In fact, I wish I was sleeping right now. But no, I can’t sleep because the minute I turned out the light tonight I knew I wouldn’t be falling into a nice dream-infested sleep anytime soon.


The darkness was too dark. I was suddenly, unquestionably nauseous and as I lay there thinking I should get up, walk around, find some water, and probably a bucket, I couldn’t move. My legs ache so much I can’t lay on my side like I normally do because they’d be touching. My feet ache. My arms, my fingers, my back, they all ache with pain. My ears are ringing, and all I want is to fall asleep after a very, very long day.


But I’m here instead, with my little plastic bucket by my feet waiting to see if I’ll throw-up again. I summoned up the stamina to walk right down the ladder of my loft bed, fall onto my couch, and precede to throw-up. Not just once, but several times. I’ve only ever been this nauseous from the dizziness, enough to make me do that, one other time that I can recall. And that was about four years ago.


I was hoping, no I was praying, that things wouldn’t get this bad so quickly. Is this another Herxheimer reaction? If so, how long will it last? Will it get worse, or will it be better? My day went from good  (I made progress in Algebra II this afternoon!), to bad (Both my parents are sick with the Flu, and I’m doing my best to dodge it), to terrible tonight. And I doubt it’ll be getting any better because I’m decently sure that I just threw up at least some of my meds. Great.


Here I go, back up my ladder bucket-in-hand.

Thanks for the venting session :)



“Sleep is like the unicorn – it is rumored to exist, but I doubt I will see any” ~Unknown